Some Insults for Beav to Copy & Paste

[DiaFramHER]

Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory

Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?

You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen!

You look like something I'd draw with my left hand!

You're so ugly, when your mom dropped you off at school she got a fine for littering!

I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit out a smarter statement than that!

I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass!

If you are going to be two faced, at least make one of them pretty!

I don't exactly hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water, I'd drink it!

Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is!

If I wanted to kill myself I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ!

It's better to let someone think you are an Idiot than to open your mouth and prove it!

Why don't you slip into something more comfortable -- like a coma!

If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world!

The only way you'll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken's ass and wait!

It looks like your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a hammer!

Somewhere out there is a tree, tirelessly producing oxygen so you can breathe. I think you owe it an apology!

If you're gonna be a smartass, first you have to be smart. Otherwise you're just an ass!

You're so fat the only letters of the alphabet you know are KFC!